The perfect mentorship

You'll need a game plan

The toughest part of any mentoring relationship is finding your match.  Once that’s done, and you have your mentor or mentee, the next thing you’ll have to overcome is the nerve-racking challenge of getting to know each other. You want to make sure you’re starting off on the right foot.

If you’re the mentor, you’ve achieved success and are used to getting requests for conversations and advice – yet taking on a mentee means investing in and providing value to one person, which requires a very different commitment.  You might be wondering if you can be helpful to your mentee? Are there specific needs they have that you can address?  Who will lead the conversations you have with your mentee, and asks the questions?  Will your mentee bring value for you and will the time you spend mentoring be put to good use?

As a mentee, you might be wondering if your mentor genuinely cares about you.  Have you had to repeat yourself or remind them about who you are or the context of your career?  Will they understand your challenges and goals?  Can you learn from them?  Have they shared any advice you been able to apply right?  Do they remember what it feels like to be in your shoes?  Can they relate to you?  Do they give you or others their full attention when you meet?   Do they really listen to you?

If these questions are answered positively, it’s likely you already have a productive mentoring relationship.  If not, think about what changes should be made.

As a mentee, one of the best ways to get the most out of the time you have with your mentor is to present something specific for them to help you solve. This does not mean you’re asking them to solve it for you or give you the answer. Rather, get to know them and listen to their advice so you can learn from their experience.  What do you want to achieve or overcome? This is far better than asking someone for general or ongoing career advice.

For your relationship to be productive, you’ll need to create a schedule. It’s won’t work to only speak with your mentor or mentee only when something comes up or when there is a problem.  Regular, scheduled meetings ensure you both come together prepared and focused on making progress while growing your relationship. 

When setting your schedule, be realistic and know that at times things come up, especially for mentors.  So, set a general guideline - like the first Tuesday of each month, that way minor rescheduling won’t derail you.

During every meeting, make time to guage your progress. On the agenda which the mentee should set and send in advance for each meeting, set aside 5-10 minutes at the beginning to talk about what happened in the interim.  What progress has been made toward the goals and action items you defined in your mentoring plan?  Having this time keeps you focused on goal setting and keeps your mentoring plan and conversation moving forward.

At the end of every meeting, designate 10 minutes to once again summarize your goals and determine what you’ll focus on before leading up to the next meeting. The mentee should then break what has been discussed into action items to be completed by the next meeting.

The mentee will then be better equipped to think about what needs to happen for them to accomplish these tasks?  Is there any way the mentor can help, perhaps through an introduction?

Mentees also should remember to ask if there is anything they can do to help the mentor out and take a few moments to ask how the mentor is doing. This can only help to strengthen the bond between you.