Maybe you’re not being ignored
Description
It’s a frustrating feeling seeing people connect, collaborate, help one another and wondering why no one reaches out to you. Why no one checks in, invites you to things, or thinks to include you. It starts to feel personal. Like you’re being overlooked. Or worse, like you don’t matter.
No one wants to think they’re giving off “leave me alone” energy. But sometimes we are. It could be out of habit, or even as a defense mechanism. If you’ve felt distant from your team, consider how approachable you actually appear. Not how you feel, but how you come across. Do you seem curious? Warm? Do you ever invite others in? Or do you keep to yourself and assume others will take the first step?
Here’s a possibility worth sitting with: maybe you’re not being ignored. Maybe people just think you don’t need them.
No one wants to think they’re giving off “leave me alone” energy. But sometimes we are. It could be out of habit, or even as a defense mechanism. If you’ve felt distant from your team, consider how approachable you actually appear. Not how you feel, but how you come across. Do you seem curious? Warm? Do you ever invite others in? Or do you keep to yourself and assume others will take the first step?
Here’s a possibility worth sitting with: maybe you’re not being ignored. Maybe people just think you don’t need them.
Summary
You’ve always carried an air of independence. You get things done. You solve problems alone. You move forward without waiting for help even though it was offered. And somewhere along the way, people start to believe you don’t want, or even like support. So they hold back.
These people do actually care though, but they’ve mistaken your self-sufficiency for a closed door.
You don’t need to force friendships or pretend to be bubbly. But if you want connection, you’ll need to signal it. A smile, a follow-up question, a thank-you that sounds like you mean it, these small cues matter. People are more likely to include someone who feels like they want to be included.
